LIFE IS NOT ALWAYS WHAT ITS "SUPPOSED" TO B

 When Observing My Surroundings I think...tooo much. I've been thinking, a lot lately. Scary, I know. We all do from time to time. If you have advice on how not to think all the time, I'm all ears. However, upon noticing throughout my 31 years of life. I know not ancient, but old enough to compare experiences, interactions, and situations. I know none of this probably makes any sense, and it may not make any sense by the end of this,but. This is my observation and complete opinion. Lately, I have been having a lot of life thoughts. Where am I going? How am I growing? What is my life long goal? Kind of life's purpose questions, etc. Without trying to be too depressing, whilest thinking of these things. I have a tendency to end up feeling like I've failed in some way or another. Which then leads to, who do I ACTUALLY have in my life? will I end up alone? This then triggers a complete whirl wind of thoughts that leads to a very depressive mind set. So, as you can

Your 31, why don't you have a husband and kids??? Well, everyone. To answer this very complicated but simple question. We have paths that we take in life. A fork in the road if you will, sort of choices. There is a sign in the middle that says 'this way to a better life' and 'this way to also a good life, but could have been better'. You see this picture I'm describing? We all have those moments we can sit back and think of, and say that's where I took the wrong left, or wrong right.  Yea, we have all had those smack your self in the forehead, patrick star moments. Back to the main thought, why am I not married? Quite simple, I have not met the right man for the blessed occasion. Missed turn number one in life: was supposed to go to school in Indiana at Hyles-Anderson Christian College. My calling, and drive was pulled in this direction so strongly. I did not go, why? fear. The main drive in any decision. I stayed and dated a man who was manipulat